Memoir of a Hitman: Random Scene #3

When you see someone die, they get permanent squatter’s rights in your brain. Look, I’m no hardened killer, death was never my preferred profession. It was never just work for me. It was always personal.

I had shot someone in the shoulder. He had come to my house. Mafia guy. I had debts, he was collecting. Apparently, he had debts, too.

“Finish me off.” He said, gritting his teeth.

He hadn’t suspected to me to use a weapon. Unfortunately for him I was more than a little angry, and he had brought a bat. I knew I had a solid line of legal defense. I had let him in, told him I was going to get the money, and then shot him from a safe distance. Who’d they believe, a mafioso or me?

“Why? I’m sure the authorities have already been called-”

“Do it, or they’ll use my family as leverage. Please.”

“I’m not going down on a murder charge.”

“Fine. Just hand me a knife. You can do that, at least?”

“Are you su-”

“Do it!”

I took a cloth out from on top of the counter and used it to grab a knife from the rack. I handed it to him.

He had been shot in the left shoulder, so he grabbed with his right hand. Then he stabbed it right into his stomach.

And that was it. He was dead. He wasn’t the first person to die in front of me. The cops came and took me away. Soon enough, I was out scot-free. That didn’t solve the whole “no money” problem though, and now I had a butthurt mafia looking for revenge. Continue reading “Memoir of a Hitman: Random Scene #3”

Bus Talker : Random Scene # 2

Foreword: Feel free to skip this part, or read it after. This story is a bit of an odd duck, doesn’t quite feel like a whole story to me. It feels like it needs context. Sure, it’s only one scene, but I’ve got even shorter stories that feel like they’re complete, resolved. Thing is, how do you create context for what is essentially an act of emotional tourism? What would his personal life matter, if this just live entertainment for him? Maybe that guy really had an arc earlier or later in his life, but I struggle to see how this could be a part of it. It isn’t important enough for him.


OK, so I’m sitting by this guy on the bus right? He goes:

“There ain’t nothing in this world more important than yourself.”

This wasn’t the first time somebody sitting by me decided to start up a lecture, with me as the sole audience. I feel like you can’t call yourself a bus rider until you’ve had someone give you an uncalled-for diatribe. Sometimes the “lesson” is so poorly given and ineffectual that it’s fun to listen to, I mean, that’s the sadist in me speaking, but the sadist in me at least knows how to have a good time.

Anyway, like all diatribes, this one was obviously meant more for himself than it was for me. I could be a mannequin, and the guy’d get the same sort of ego-boosting-satisfaction. Or extreme regret, I had no idea, these people would always leave my life within the hour. People with their minds all chewed up with thoughts so powerful that they have to talk to total strangers gives away at least some degree of desperation, so I always listened politely. I’d hope for the same if I was in their mental state.

“Seriously, nothing at all.”

I tilted my head slightly, feigning a look of honest reflection.

Continue reading “Bus Talker : Random Scene # 2”

A Random Scene (#1)

  • Announcement: I got published in 365 Tomorrows, check that out HERE.

A lot of times, I write these random scenes, usually hoping that they’ll grow into a full story. Sometimes they just don’t. Since I have no hope in ever getting those published, I’ll just post them here. This one, like a lot of them, is just a simple conversation between two people. I might come back to the idea at some point, I think there’s some comedic/surreal potential here.

I was waiting in line at a pharmacy.

“So, what are you in for?” The guy behind me asked.

“What, is this a prison or something?”

“Well a prison is a correctional facility, right? People come here for fixin’ too.”

“So a disease is equivalent to, what, a misdemeanor?”

Continue reading “A Random Scene (#1)”